Waiting on the Lord

 

This young man has played football since he was four, sitting out only last season. That makes this his 10th season playing the game he loves so much.  Although his heart for football has always been bigger than life itself, he spent 9 seasons watching from the sidelines.  He always gave it his all at practices, knowing his size hindered him from an easy spot on the field.  Year after year, we went to the games, watching through tears as our boy had to watch his friends (some of whom got to start even their first year playing), live out his dream.  We would always encourage him to support his team, have a good attitude, and work even harder.  I NEVER, and I mean NEVER, heard him say a negative word about anyone getting to play.  He was always just grateful to be a part of the team.  It was like added family for him.  

When it finally seemed like it may have been his time, God called us to WV and to homeschool.  Both of which turned into a nightmare for Cade.  We watched our joyful, spunky young man turn into a slightly bitter and negative guy who was miserable with life.  Over and over, he reminded us that God may have called us to WV, but He didn't call Cade to WV.  As if things weren't hard enough, we added another sister to the family, and he was no longer the oldest.  Things couldn't get worse for him in his eyes. Zoe got to go to public school (state requirement for foster care), and Cade watched bitterly as he had to remain home.  I have only seen him in such a dark place once before...when Faith died.  My heart was broken for him.  

After much prayer, Rob and I decided to allow him to go to high school.  We felt like he and Zoe could keep an eye on one another, and he desperately wanted to play football.  He started summer workouts (6 am mornings in our house every day of summer), with an eager heart.  Mine was not so eager. I was TIRED!  I worried about him not knowing anyone, being small, and being disappointed once again.  I knew he couldn't take anymore disappointment in WV.  Every day, when we would pick him up, he was on cloud 9.  Even though he knew he wouldn't start, he was just grateful to have a chance to make friends, be a part of a team, and work towards being an active player his sophomore year.  We met the coaches, and I was immediately impressed with the care they showed Cade.  Cade never once felt like an outsider, but everyone, including the kids, made him feel a part of something he hadn't felt in a while.

As the summer plugged along, we continued to see Cade grow in confidence, work ethic, and gratefulness.  He was still continuing to deal with some bitterness about adding a sibling, which was hindering his walk with the Lord.  God allowed him to go to Snowbird with our youth group from FL.  We spoke with Tim, our youth pastor and dearest friend who has taught us so much, and he offered to spend some time with Cade.  That week, God showed him that he had to love his new sister, because Jesus loved us even when we didn't deserve it.  He came home renewed and with a different attitude.  As he returned to football, it was becoming more clear he was going to get a chance to play.  Second-string was a highlight for him.  He was ECSTATIC!  

School began, and he was too excited to start his freshman year.  He had made a ton of friends, and walked in the first day as if he had been here all of his life.  He was thriving!  He got added to the Varsity scout team, which gave him more practice time.  He shared with us that even though it was only "scout team", he saw it as an opportunity to grow, to learn, and to get better.  He was so grateful.  The JV team dresses out each Friday night for the Varsity games, and we watched as he cheered relentlessly for his new brothers on the field.  He was patiently waiting his turn on the field once JV games would start.  

The first JV game was scheduled for Labor Day.  Our family had already made plans to travel that weekend, because our schedules are so busy, we HAVE to make time to spend as a family.  However, the game interfered with our trip.  Cade made the decision to stay back with some special friends, so he could play in his game.  We made plans to leave TN early because there was no way I was missing that game!  We left Thursday morning for Pigeon Forge, only for Cade to call us late Thursday evening with news the game had been cancelled.  I was furious and heartbroken for him.  He had given up time with his family doing fun things, to reap the fruit of what he had been working so hard on.  We tried everything we could to get him to TN, but nothing was going to be possible.  I was mad...Cade was ok.  He said "Mom, it's ok.  I'll just stay here and rest."  I am so thankful for special people God has given us here who love our kids like their own.  They are a blessing!!  And his attitude spoke volumes to my bitter heart. 

Fast forward to last night.  We experienced a first in all the years of being Cade's parents.  We got to see our boy start on kick return, defense, and play off and on offense.  He made numerous tackles (mostly on kids twice his size), blocked 2 passes, and even ran the ball for 5 yards.  I couldn't have been more proud.  This is what he has dreamed of since he was a toddler.  While all of that was more than exciting for us and for him,  God spoke to me and showed me something I have been struggling with myself.  Often times, we have dreams.  We work so hard to see them come to fruition.  But many times, we have to sit on the sidelines of many seasons until it is our turn.  We still have work to do, to be prepared, to get stronger and more confident.  Sometimes we have to watch others live our dreams, and it is so easy to be mad, bitter, discouraged, and angry.  We quit because it is hard.  We become ungrateful for all that God is trying to teach us, and how He is trying to prepare us.  You see, last night wasn't about the fact that Cade had the greatest night of his life.  Yes it was awesome!!  But it was more about God's timing.  After all of those years of preparing Cade for his time to shine, God was teaching him and showing him how to be the best he could be when his time came.  Rob and I are having to learn that in our own lives in this season.  It seems like we are on the sidelines, waiting for our moment, but we have to be patient, listening to the Savior as He teaches us and prepares our hearts for the big game. 

This verse was in a devotion this morning and I thought it was fitting:

“Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him; Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way, Because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass. Cease from anger, and forsake wrath; Do not fret— it only causes harm.”

Psalms 37:7-8 

We are learning to rest in the Lord.  And wait patiently for Him and His timing.  He knows best, and his timing and plans are perfect.  He knows what He is doing.  

My prayer is that while we are waiting, like Cade, we will learn to be grateful in all things, see every opportunity as a chance to grow in Jesus, and become more like Him.  Then when it is our turn to hit the field, we will glorify Him and make Him proud.  

Are you sitting on the sidelines?  Seek Jesus and be willing to play with your whole heart!  Even if it doesn't look like you think it should.  God is good, all the time!  Wait on the Lord and do NOT grow weary.  Due season is coming!

Isaiah 40:31 

³¹ But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

Galatians 6:9

⁹ And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.